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Thinking about vicious roving gangs of teens who just can't get enough of evolution.
(I assume that these evil teens also have books is part of what is so scary here? IDK. This would be a fun group Halloween costume IMO)
*indistinct hip hop music plays*
"You check this adaptive radiation!"
"The rats in the graffiti hang out are an isolated population and have a higher instance of white spots on their fur."
"Could be because people like to feed the spotted ones"
"Totally radical!"
@futurebird I would actually wear that "MY ANCESTOR" T-shirt. I'm almost considering getting one printed.
Why the monkey gotta be smirking like that? Is that how creationists feel when they read about Lucy. She's looking at them like "gotcha fool"
@futurebird @FenTiger What puzzles me us that they have guns in school but aren't actually using them – ie the guns apparently are for self-defense . According to conservatives, doesn't that make them the good guys?
@futurebird @FenTiger
well ive got good news and bad news
the bad news is i don't even remember where I ordered this from 2 years ago and that they were already a limited run back then
@futurebird @FenTiger oh and the second bad news is you think this is really funny now but when you wear it outside of the house its just kinda weird and reads like you're one of "Those Athiests" so you don't end up wearing it out... i think if i cut off the sleeves and made it into a summer tank top it would be okay
@dantescanline @futurebird @FenTiger
Especially if you have really hairy arms.
People be, like, "That adds up."
((giggle))
@dantescanline @futurebird @FenTiger omg this is great
@dantescanline Oooh, does this imply that the "drugs" one is from the physical world too?
@FenTiger @futurebird jumped in to say the same thing. It's a great concept.
@mrcompletely @FenTiger @futurebird
https://www.etsy.com/listing/788817849/my-ancestor-short-sleeve-unisex-t-shirt
You can buy it elsewhere too. Just search for it.
@kingkaufman @mrcompletely @FenTiger @futurebird if not for the weapons, this would be the best clique in school. I may have bought one of the few remaining ape ancestor shirts from that Etsy seller 
@mrcompletely @FenTiger @futurebird With Moms for Liberty running the school board, students must take their educations into their own hands
@FenTiger @futurebird
Same, especially with that ape that looks vaguely like Lupin III
@FenTiger @futurebird 100% I'd wear the DRUGS skull shirt.
@FenTiger @futurebird let's do the DRUGS one also
@FenTiger @futurebird I'd use the most accurate reconstruction of the face of a female Australopithecus I could find if I were to do that.
@LordCaramac @futurebird That's just about what I had in mind. It would have to be as scientifically accurate as possible.
@FenTiger @futurebird I'd also change the text to "honour your ancestors" or something like that.
@futurebird I’m sure this was a team of superheroes written by Grant Morrison around 1991.
@Nickiquote @futurebird I *legitimately* thought it might be art from one of the early Cyberpunk rulebooks until I looked closer
@eaton @Nickiquote @futurebird
yeah, 100% my first thought as well
@eaton @Nickiquote @futurebird
(also: I would have wanted to hang out with them 30yr ago)
@Nickiquote @futurebird No way! That was my first thought.
@Nickiquote @futurebird As usual Grant has written themself into it!
@Gosunkugi @futurebird I think Grant might be all of them.
[Edited because I forgot Grant goes by singular “they” pronouns]
@Nickiquote @futurebird you know that's the first thing I was going to do when I realised, but then I remembered Grant doesn't really mind. I'll still edit it, because it's the right thing to do though. Cheers 
@futurebird The “DRUGS 
“ shirt is saying that drugs will kill you
@dx @futurebird This is why I originally assumed that **SMOKING KILLS** was some new punk band or something.
@futurebird Drugs shirt is excellent. Would print up a dozen to sell. Maybe without the ring collar.
@dschwarz @futurebird I picture it as be of those 80’s era baseball jerseys. Under the leather jacket it has contrasting 3/4 sleeves. Team Drugs!
@futurebird I think that girl might be into it. And why not, given all the sexual healthcare availability. You get some, lady.
This is halfway towards being the starting party and actual rulebook illustration for a very 90s TTRPG named something like 'Cyberpunk High School' or somesuch.
@ciggysmokebringer @futurebird STUYVESANT LIBERTINE GANG WAR SUPPLEMENT
@ciggysmokebringer @futurebird Dammit now I need to go re-watch #HACKERS. @hackers_gifs
@futurebird Or because they got paint splashed on them. Need to check if it’s inherited.
@futurebird Hanging out with Jack Chick would've been hell on earth, so I'll party with the delinquents.
I'll take the radical lessons on my furry ancestors and the bodacious orientation counseling; I'll leave the birth control and drugs for the others to enjoy.
@futurebird Why is it that these things always seem to be threatening me with a good time?
@futurebird wonder what the NRA thinks about this
@futurebird This goes hard
@futurebird
Bringing a knife to a gunfight I can understand. But a book? That's radical as.
OMG I need a "DRUGS" T-shirt.
@tikistitch@toot.community @futurebird@sauropods.win I want the "My Ancestor" T-shirt myself
I love how they all popped their collars too - because they're BAD. (Or because the artist couldn't really draw collars.)
@futurebird every single one of those shirts would MOVE UNITS on redbubble, no question
@futurebird DRUGS I need to get this for my teen
@futurebird Respectable young folk helping protect people visiting or working at the planned parenthood center from pro-life attackers.
@futurebird Bald Clint Howard will defend your choice of gender with KNIVES
@futurebird Why do the DRUGS guy’s legs resemble veiny penises?
@futurebird I'd have an opinion, but I'm laughing too damn hard.
@futurebird
Antifa super-soldiers protecting drag story hour from a violent conservative mob (2022)
@futurebird It's quite funny they are suddenly so offend by people freely having access to weapons, for once.
JR
@JGR0 @futurebird wow what the actual fuck
People really do think it's like this.
And they need to to justify all the things they are breaking.